Creepiest Ice Cream Ad Ever

THIS IS THE SHIT FAT NIGGAS LIKE ME HAVE NIGHTMARES ABOUT.

THESE MUGS LITERALLY MUSTA PULLED THIS OUT OF MY 12 YEAR OLD BRAIN ON SOME SERIOUS INCEPTION SHIT.

@oakshades

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Krokodil: The Fucked Up Drug For The TRUE Fiend

I can recall seeing this video a few years ago (this current one must be a re-upload?) but holy shit — as a man who has seen every terrible thing the black hole of the Internet has to offer, I can assure you that the above video IS NOT FOR THE WEAK AND NOT SAFE FOR WORK OR LIFE. I felt the urge to write something up on it after this a series of disturbing photos titled “Krokodil House” popped up on Reddit today. Imagine a crackhouse, but with 1,000x less quotability and much, much more depressing.

What you’re seeing in the video is a woman in the throes of krokodil addiction, suffering the insane effects the drug brings upon its users. Krokodil is basically a “moonshine heroin” made from a slew of store bought ingredients like codeine based medicine and eyedrops. Although it’s cheaper than heroin, the effects are infinitely more gruesome, namely the fact that a users skin literally rots off their body. Hence the name Krokodil so closely resembling the word “crocodile”, an animal with scaly skin. From a great article in The Independent talking about krokodil users:

“She won’t go to hospital, she just keeps injecting. Her flesh is falling off and she can hardly move anymore,” says Sasha. Photographs of late-stage krokodil addicts are disturbing in the extreme. Flesh goes grey and peels away to leave bones exposed. People literally rot to death.

Jesus, Russia has a bad enough heroin problem as is. Afghanistan is stationed below Russia, a country responsible for 92% of the world’s opium production. Russia is flooded with this heroin — perhaps a form of “narco-terrorism” — and now consumes nearly 20% of that heroin, with 1.5 million addicted users, 80 of which are dying from it every single day. Now you throw krokodil in there? Fuck. I mean, think about how fiended Russia is: this is the country that ran out of vodka after World War II concluded. Now they’re shooting up moonshine heroin. No thanks, I’ll stick to rolling Dutch Masters.

-Droog

PS: As usual, VICE did a great documentary on the krokodil problem in Russia. I honestly thought they could have made it more fucked up but the emptiness in krokodil addicts eyes is fucking harrowing to say the least. Just nothing there.

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Ayoo Chicken Lovers: How To Debone A Wing

I was gonna go one of two different routes while writing this lil blurb. I was gonna either go in on how I don’t want my daughter to be attractive enough to be a hooter’s girl but still be super pretty cause we all know the struggle of the ugly girl but at the same time Titties, Ass and a decent face can get a girl alot of negative attention. The other path was one where I clown on the idea that Hooters put out a video on how to debone a wing and how dumb that was cause obviously you just put said wing in your mouth and fip all the meat off. BUT, goddamn this was a seriously informative video. Did you see how clean those bones were? Not one little piece of chicken was wasted. Thanks Jordan!

@oakshades

PS. Hi Jordan. Lemmmmme take you to the moviesssss girl

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Fayzarahmanist Sect Living Under Russia for a Decade

Seventy members of an Islamist sect in Russia have been found living in an underground bunker without heat or sunlight on the outskirts of the city of Kazan, according to Russian media.

The sect members – including 20 children, the youngest of whom was 18 months old – are thought to have been underground for nearly a decade.

Many of the children were born underground and had never seen daylight until the prosecutors discovered them on 1 August. After health checks, a 17-year-old girl turned out to be pregnant.

The group, known as the Fayzarahmanist sect, was named after its 83-year-old organiser Fayzrahman Satarov, who declared himself a prophet and his house an independent Islamic state, according to a report by state TV channel Vesti.

Satarov was described as a former deputy to a Sunni Islamic cleric in the 1970s. His followers were encouraged to read his manuscripts and most were banned from leaving their eight-storey underground bunker, which had been dug in the basement of a building, Vesti said.

Prosecutors have opened a criminal investigation into the sect and have said it will be disbanded if it continues its illegal activities, such as stopping its members from seeking medical assistance or education.

No arrests have been made although police are likely to look into suspicions that some of the children were being abused. A court will decide whether the children will be allowed to stay with their parents.

Kazan is 497 miles east of Moscow in Tatarstan, a majority Muslim internal Russian republic.

I fucking hate the subway. Why? Cause it’s underground and that shit creeps me the fuck out. I bug out sometimes walking around NYC looking up at the buildings and realizing that WE ARE FUCKING MONKEYS ON A HUGE ROCK FLYING THRU OUTER SPACE… Oh so you want me to now get in a metal bullet and fly around on some metal tracks UNDERNEATH sky scrapers and mad fiends eating hot dogs and drinking Starbucks and not get a little worried about what the fuck would happen if some wild shit popped off? Worddddd.

But shit I kinda understand why these homies burrowed underground. Free vibrators on the corner of NYC and Russian homies playing in traffic with shopping carts ===>

I mean like what kinda society has Russia established as the norm over there where dude is so drunk so early in the am that he’s just reenacting the 7 year old’s joy of playing in shopping carts… in traffic?

I get it bro. I wanna start my own commune too but you can’t just bunker up your set and not let them see day light. Kids need that Vitamin E my g.

Too each his own I guess?

@oakshades

VIA

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Skrillex and Boys Noize team up for ‘acid house’ project Dog Blood

The Boys Noize news has been coming thick and fast lately. After announcing that we could expect his next album come October, the man otherwise known as Alex Ridha has dropped his first single from the forthcoming LP, prepped a new live stage show and most recently, got on board Diplo’s BBC 1 program to deliver a 60-minute mix. But while we’ve been waiting for a new Boys Noize album and all that goes with it for a while now, this latest report from camp Ridha has come somewhat out of left field: according to the ever-accurate internet, Boys Noize may have collaborated with none other than Skrillex. The emphasis, here, is on the may.

Earlier this morning, Skrillex posted a teaser video for a track titled Next Order, attributed to an artist called Dog Blood. The 1:43 video features the logos of both Skrillex’s label OWSLA and Boysnoize Records, and is described as “MIDDLE FINGER ACID TERROR from BNR and OWSLA”. As you’d expect given the involvement of both labels, it hasn’t taken long for speculation to run rife that Dog Blood isn’t a new artist, but the name of a new collaborative project between Boys Noize and Skrillex.

As well as a league of vocal Facebook fans, Sydney electro institution Trashbags has weighed on in the matter. “Yes, they are a duo as Dog Blood,” Trashbags’ Facebook alleged. “We can confirm this.” While an Alex Ridha/Sonny Moore hook-up might not be entirely expected, Ridha has recently expressed his desire to delve into a harder sound, à la Mr Moore. “I always love to play jacking stuff and harder stuff,” he told Rolling Stone. “Right now, like in the last two years, a lot of the electronic music, or what you call now EDM, it feels too generic for me sometimes and a bit soulless.”

So far, neither Skrillex nor Boys Noize have commented on who or what Dog Blood is – so yes, this is all purely speculation at the moment. While we wait for more clues, check out the Dog Blood Next Order teaser below.

FUCKING DIRTY.

I know some of ya’ll don’t fuck with this shit, but some of you do. If you fucks with Electronic music then click this video and get excited for this project.

@oakshades

PS. And fuck you elitist snobs that are like Skrillex is killing EDM… eat a dick you pretentious ‘I;m too cool for Earth’ ass niggas in the face.

VIA

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Find Your Greatness – Nike Commercial

Yo Nike you know what I’m great at? Being a fat, lazy, #supermooked piece of shit.

@oakshades

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Free Vibrator Alert: What the Fuck is Wrong With America?

New Yorkers are constantly being given free food on the street, but free vibrators? From hot dog carts decked out with slogans like “Getcha vibes here!” and “Relish the moment?” Sure, why not!

On Wednesday and Thursday, Trojan says it will be handing out 5,000 of its Tri-Phoria sex toys (retail value, $40) and another 5,000 of its Pulse toys (retail value, $30) from two very special hot dog carts in different locations around the city. According to the company, it is the biggest vibrator handout in history. Even bigger than the great Allied vibrator air drop over France during World War II?! Look, press releases don’t lie. Verily, this is a street meat feat that can’t be beat!

The logic behind the giveaway isn’t just free press (though it obviously is that too—you are welcome Trojan overlords at Church & Dwight!) but also to further finish the job Sex and the City and its rabbit started: making sex toys boring. “What we’re doing is taking something like a hot dog cart that is so everyday and so mainstream and we’re showing people that vibrators are mainstream,” Bruce Weiss, vice president for marketing at Trojan, told the Times of the giveaway.

So you want to pick up some free pleasure on street? Here’s where the carts will be this week:

PROVE TO ME THAT THIS ISN’T A FAKE WORLD WHERE FREE VIBRATORS ARE GIVEN OUT ON STREET CORNERS IN NYC. I’m all for chicks finding their inner freak… shit I applaud the ladies that are at home thinking of Robert Pattinsons shoving 8 foot dildos up their you know what I’m talking about but what about the kids? I always thought that bitches get together for ‘Book Clubs’ or ‘Tupperware Parties’ and that’s where they sipped white wine spritzers and gossiped about their sex lives. That’s where a lady finds out about the joys of vibrators. Not on the corner of 3rd ave and 14th street. DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY UNSUSPECTING FATHERS DROPPED THEIR LITTLE GIRLS OFF AT THEIR NYU DORMS ON THIRD AVE AND 14TH STREET THIS MORNING? YOUR DAUGHTER IS GOING TO BE HANDED A $50 VIBRATOR SIR. FOR FREE.

FUCK THIS SHIT.

#TEAMNODAUGHTERS

@oakshades

PS. Ladies here is where you can get a free joint today or tomorrow… Hit me if you need a creepy dude to slowly masturbate in the corner while breathing heavily and watching your every move.

VIA

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Syrian Civil War

Well we’ve been in a rah rah go America state of mind for the last few weeks but unknown to most the most bloody revolution of this ‘Arab Spring’ is occuring right now. First of all, how fucking wild is it that for like a year revolts and uprisings have been occurring thru out the middle east? Second of all, how fucking wild is it that on my cab ride to work this am, there was a 5 minute video about JWowww and nothing about a civil war that could have massive repercussions on international politics? I fucking hate the US media. Watch the video and then check out these pics captured via Instagram…

@oakshades

PS. CAN YOU IMAGINE IF SOME FIENDS IN BROOKLYN PUT UP FUCK BLOOMBERG GRAFFITI AND THE NYPD CAME THRU WITH SNIPERS AND STARTED MURKING HOMIES AND THEN INSTAGRAMS FROM NYC STARTED TO LOOK LIKE THIS =====>

“The government killed his entire family n wonder why little kids are fighting against them smh. Wa kilmit 7oriye yumma itgabl hal roosiya (and the word freedom evades Russia).. Wa ijeetich yumma shaheed, la tibchee 3alayaaaaa #syria #freesyria #freedomfighter #fsa #freesyrianarmy #sham #damascus #homs #aleppo #hama #fku” @sirley_f

“المقاومه بسوريا”
“Syria’s Resistance”

“رغم الألم فالأمل بنصر الله أقوى #سوريا”
“Despite the pain, hope in victory, God is the strongest #Syria”

“ابطال #صلاح_الدين الله يحميكم ويسدد رميكم #سوريا #حلب #ثورة #الجيش_الحر #syria #aleppo #FSA”
“Champions, may God protect you and guide you #Syria #Aleppo #Revolution #Rebel Army”

“Beautiful people die from hideous regimes. #syria .”

PPS. I’m gonna go back to my comfortable American life filled with illegal MP3 downloads and oversized beverages but at least I try and be semi-aware of what the fuck is going on in the world. You should do the same.

VIA
VIA

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Sun Yang X Beats By Dre

I was watching the Olympics super mooked and almost spit my beer out when I saw this shit.

The homie Sun Yang was rocking Beats by Dre in a special Chinese Flag colorway.

How official is that shit? I already seen all the Team USA basketball homies wearing some exclusive shit too. The more I look, the more Beats by Dre I see in exclusive colorways unique to different countries.

Real talk, the matching Beats by Dre is almost part of the Olympic jump suit. Everyone has it. Dre is fucking killing it this Olympics. He don’t give a fuck what county you from, you just better have on these beats by dre matching your shit. Fuck country loyalty, he’s only loyal to the money baby!

I can fuck with that. I want these Sun Yang joints.

@Wave_Bandana

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Is Rajon Rondo Serious With This Shirt?

It doesn’t matter who you are, if you’re in a picture with Snoop Dogg — or Snoop Lion I guess — you’re guilty by association and therefore high as fuck. Mark Zuckerberg is a total dweeb but here he is with Snoop, and he’s definitely mooked. We know for sure that Sean Parker is fucked up in that photo because is a complete fiend.

Either way, you know Rondo and KG are both blazed in this photo and blazed frequently. I remember in 2008 when Josh Howard said 70 percent of the NBA was burning and everyone freaked the fuck out. How is this a surprise to anyone with a pulse? Imagine if everyone during the Malice at the Palace was just high while they were playing…you think Ron Artest is running into those stands? You think Stephen Jackson is delivering the most epic sliding punch of all time?

Actually scratch them being high and pacifism reinging supreme over chaos. That fight was the craziest shit ever. But Rondo is still blazed in this photo.

-Droog

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