Unlocking The Truth

This shit was fucking cool as shit. Everytime I see something like this. Two black kids that get the world on a level that it took me 25 years to get to. Lil homies so comfortable in their own skin that they started a metal band and rock the fuck out in NYC. Everytime I see something like this … I cannot believe I legitimately thought I was gonna be in the NBA. I wasted so much time practicing lefty layups and trying to be cool. This nigga said I don’t care, I know I’m gonna be famous. He’s right. He is gonna be famous. He’s got the confidence of Jimi Hendrix reincarnate. These fiends are cool as shit.

@oakshades

PS. It’s gonna be sad when they get a female lead that they both fall in love with and end up tearing apart the band over.

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Never Been Happier To Be Called RATCHET

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This weekend, the re-entry stamp for the world famous DJais bar at the Jersey Shore was fucking RATCHET.

If you follow us, then you know we love getting blacked out and doing drugs at DJais in the summer. We post about that shit all the time, but one thing I noticed is we never mentioned how important the re-entry stamp is. The DJais re-entry stamp is your life-blood for the Jersey Shore in Belmar. Before night falls, your only goal is to get that stamp. The best move is to go there for happy hour, get stamped, and then you are free to come and go as you please. Otherwise once it’s night time, the line to enter is literally 1-2 hours long.

When you get the stamp, it’s like the weight of the world has been lifted from your shoulders. You can skip the line at any time. I can’t describe how good this feeling is and how important this is. Let me paint a picture for you:

The Jersey Shore is like a mix of a fiend summer camp and a college campus for adults. People are partying literally everywhere all day long, from the house parties, to the beach, to other bars and around town. All throughout your J Shore travels you will meet people. So say you and some friends meet a cute group of girls or guys. You all are hitting it off and then one of them says lets got to DJais. Everyone gets excited and goes in. BUT, you were an asshole and didn’t get stamped earlier in the day. Now your ass is in a 2 hour long line while everyone else already went inside and is turning up. Yea sure, the cute chick/dude said they would wait for you inside, but it’s a fiend jungle in there. By the time your dumbass gets in 2 hours later that person is 100% going to be grinding on someone else. You just lost out on cutty because your bitch ass didn’t get stamped.

That is just one reason why that shit is so important. I can think of thousands. But the moral of the story is: get fucking stamped. And when you do, you do everything in your power to protect this stamp. If you shower, you wrap that bitch up in plastic. This shit is like your fiend passport.

But this weekend the stamp was fucking RATCHET. I’ve never seen so many grown ass men and women so happy to have RATCHET written all over their body and clothes. Shit was funny as fuck. Everywhere you went, just drunk ass white people with RATCHET all over them. I saw a group of black dudes that literally could not comprehend this shit. Shit must have been so confusing to see some preppy white girl, happy as hell she has RATCHET written on her. Mind blowing shit.

@Wave_Bandana / Blogs

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Poor Miss Utah

It’s 2013. Why are we still doing this? Why do we ask them to talk? Why can’t we just get mad homies to sit in an audience and decide on a scale of 1-10 who is the baddest bitch? Also. Why the fuck am I not in charge of this shit? Why aren’t we testing out their cooking skills? I’m not even trying to be a dickhead but chicks tend to cook better then dudes right? So if I’m judging chicks I feel like they should bust out their number 1 recipe.

OHHHH you’re mysgonistic oakshades. AM I? Am I really a bad guy for saying that I’d test cooking in these pageants? You’re gonna put an idiot in high hells and a tight dress and purposefully lob questions at her waiting for her to say some dumb shit like she did and I’m the bad guy? You strutting out chicks in Bikinis playing Banjos but I’m a bad guy for wanting to see her whip up some grub?

This whole culture is weird to me. And this aint some dude shit. This shit is definitely a woman’s world. Ya’ll are the weirdos. Feminists need to fix this shit before they give us normal dudes who love chicks a hard time for literally anything us dumb fucks say.

@oakshades

PS. I feel so bad for her man.

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Bornsinner.com | Cedric “Ced” Brown

One of the craziest things that I’ve learned about America was told to me by Ced. If you get arrested for committing a crime, go to jail and then get granted probation … you have to pay to stay on probation vs going back to jail. Seems like a pretty fair punishment until you dig a little deeper. You just got out of jail for doing something illegal … most likely because this was your source of income. So you are fresh out of jail and now you need a job. So you go to apply for jobs but you cannot get a job cause you are fresh out of jail. But if you don’t pay what you owe, your probation officer is gonna let the system know and then you’re back in jail. So what do you do now? You prolly end up doing what you know can make you some money.

You see the cycle?

@oakshades

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Dollar And A Dream Tour | Miami

Yo. This shit was crazy. Kids were lined up waiting to get in to the venue at 5am. Shit was insane. Cole fans love him like no other. So I got there around 3pm. The fire marshalls got there around 4pm. Around 6pm they decided that they were gonna OD cockblock us and set the occupancy limit at 350 vs 800. That meant that half of the kids that were lined up to see the show were gonna be assed out. Instead of letting this happen, Cole did two shows. We were there till 2 AM. And it wasn’t like a half ass lemme play three songs and get the fuck outta here for the 2nd go around. Cole went harder for the second show. Shit was mad inspiring to watch.

@oaksahdes

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Trippy Resonance Experiment

Nikola Tesla is probably the most interesting fiend you’ve never heard of. I can’t even go into detail about his life cause I’m not qualified to explain that shit to you. Esentially tho, he came to America to work for Thomas Edison. Then he got his own guap up and bounced to do his own thing. Dude was way ahead of his time when it came to technology. This fiend was talking about ‘The Cloud’ in the early 1900s. I smoke alot of mook and everytime I eat mushrooms I come to a simple conclusion. I think people’s brains are almost on some Radio or WiFi kinda shit. I think we’re constantly shooting off ‘vibes’ and also constantly receiving ‘vibes’. This is a conversation best had super mooked so if you ever see me in the streets and wanna disucss… SPARK SOME SHIT.

@oakshades

PS. Don’t mind me… I’m just a fucking psuedophilosopherhippie tryna figure out the world.

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NBA Stars Read Tweets

I say this every fucking time … I could watch this for an hour straight. Where is the all Chris Bosh edition? How bout only Knicks tweets … both after a win but most importantly after a loss? I’ve said some shit on Twitter that if we were a little more famous by now, I’d have started so many beefs.

@oakshades

PS. Jimmy Kimmel is easily the funniest Talk show howst homie.

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Drunk Driving Ad

1. This shit is fake. Those dudes are terrible actors.
2. I would have shit myself
3. How bout we just do the simplest shit ever and require every car in the country to have a breathalizer to start function?

@oakshades

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New York Times – @JColeNC feat @FiendBassy and @50Cent

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Honestly this is the epitome of Dreamville. You gotta understand that 50 Cent was the dude that showed me how amazing music is. I was 13 when Fifty turned up the NYC streets with his mixtapes. I remember being in class and hearing people drive past our High School BLASTING Get Rich or Die Tryin. We even somehow juxed our HS into playing GRODT through out the whole school over the loud speakers in between classes … until they heard the lyrics like a week later and freaked out. Two years ago when Bas started this rap journey we were smoking at The Carter joking about how once he records his first joint with 50 we were getting G-Unit chains…

THIS NIGGA REALLY IS ON A JOINT WITH FIFTY.

@oakshades

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Fire Safety

I feel like a white girl made this. I also feel like maybe I should find her and marry her.

@oakshades

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