Kendrick Lamar – Swimming Pools (Drank) (Official Music Video)

If you follow us you know I consistently post Kendrick shit. I’m a big fan of his music even though most of my preferences don’t include many “conscious” rap artists (I hate that fucking label though, Some of the most ignorant rappers ever have “conscious” , genius bars). But you get what I mean. He’s a different style than most of my favorites.

I’ve always supported him, but I’ve noticed that every video or song there is always some online comment like “yo he nice but he need to dumb it down b…”

As much as it hurts my heart, to achieve mainstream success he most likely will have to find that medium. I think this record is a nice start. I think he’s going to be able to figure out a place that satisfies him creatively and also appeals to the masses.

I really like this record. Crazy quick turn around on the visuals too.

@Wave_Bandana

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Fire Hydrant Between 2 Cop Cars – Worst Parking Spot Ever?

We were so mooked we were actually considering parking here last night.

Is that not the most fucking fiend parking spot of all time? Like what could be a hotter place to park? Especially when mooked and riding dirty.

I feel like if you park there that’s not even a trip tot he towing company like we did last week (See Article), I feel like that’s a trip to central booking. Anyone that ignorant or hard body to park there shouldn’t be allowed to participate in society.

Only fucking fiends would even contemplate this shit.

@Wave_Bandana

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What Losing $500 Million Worth of Drugs Looks Like:

In what turned out to be one of the largest hauls of crystal meth and the biggest heroin bust in Australian history authorities smashed a Hong Kong-linked international drugs syndicate.

One time I was coming into the city with a fresh 8th of mook to meet my friends. We were in high school at the time, so an 8th was the equivalent to about $500 million dollars worth of meth. My friends had been struggling to find bud all day. It was one of those days where you end up calling a friend of a friend of a friend’s old mook dealer. You know those days where it seems the mook universe is against you? Those days when your calling your older/younger siblings friends and shit just to hit multiple age demographics. It was maybe the hardest day to find bud in our mook history. But I was coming in with a fresh bag of NJ BOO to save the day.

I still to this day don’t know what happened. But somehow I lost the 8th in Port Authority. You should have seen my friends’ faces. I could have fucked their mother in front of them and they would have had a less sour face.

Years later on I was supposed to bring all the Molli to Electric Zoo. I got overconfident from successfully smuggling it in the past. They did a better search this time and it got confiscated. Showing up to a music festival that everyone paid $100+ for, emptied handed was the second most angry I’ve seen people that supposedly care about me.

The point is, to all the Hong Kong international drugs syndicates, I feel your pain. I fucked up like that before too. I wish I could offer you words of comfort but I can’t. All the good things I’ve done for my friends over the last 24 years, they never let me live those 2 days down. Those were two of the biggest bummers ever. I’m assuming losing $500 million dollars of meth is just like that.

My only advice would be to put $500 Million on black and try to win that shit back.

@Wave_Bandana

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Chocolate Mook

Saw this article 10 Foods You Crave – And Why You Crave Them . Look at #1

1. When you crave chocolate you need to get high

Chocolate took most Western nations by storm, and looking at it today, it’s easy to think you know why. It has all the necessary components. It’s sweet and fatty and the perfect dessert. Of course, the cocoa beans that first became popular weren’t any of those things. Although they were dressed up different ways, for a long time chocolate was relatively coarse and bitter. Originally it was mostly served with spices as a drink, or over snow. While early Americans did occasionally sweeten it, it took a while before Europeans thought to add sugar to chocolate, and even longer before they added milk. It was often served over meat as a savory substance. So why was this flavor so very, very popular?

Some people point to phenylethylamine (PEA), the so-called “love chemical” that people produce when they’re in love or feeling especially happy and excited. Researchers point out that PEA breaks down to quickly in the body to actually affect the way that people act, and that other food, like cheese, contains more PEA anyway. A more likely story is the cannabinoids that chocolate contains. These chemicals, related to the THC found in marijuana, trigger anandamide, known as the “bliss molecule.” This triggers a high of happiness and well-being that a lot of people feel after eating chocolate. Researchers point out that most people would have to eat pounds of chocolate to get the same high as they would from pot. Chocolate also contains theobromine, a compound similar to the caffeine that gets people addicted to coffee. Chocolate, as it turns out, is a bubbling brew of 380 chemicals, a bunch of which are known to have an effect on mood. It’s a darling little meth lab of feel-good chemicals in a heart-shaped box. Forget alcohol or tobacco, this is the drug of choice for pretty much everyone.

“Researchers point out that most people would have to eat pounds of chocolate to get the same high as they would from pot.”

Do you understand what a potential game changer this is for the trap community?

Not to mention now that a dub = a pound of chocolate, so many rappers need to change their bars. Trapping pounds just isn’t that cool anymore. For real though, if they came up with a way to easily extract this at your crib it would change the game forever. We would potentially have LEGAL access to an unlimited amount of cannabinoids.

You might be saying to yourself, Wave, a dub of bud cost less than a pound of chocolate. You may be right, but can you name a day where the entire USA gives away free mook? Never ever happens, no matter how many eye lashes I lost wishing that. However is there a day the entire USA gives away free  chocolate cannabinoids?

Halloween.

Halloween would become the most import day of the year for mook heads and trappers. All those songs about re-upping on “the first of the monthhhhh” would get changed to “I re-up on october 31sttttt”.

When I was a kid I easily got multiple pounds of chocolate every Halloween. If they can figure out how to extract this shit, all trappers would have to do is kill it on Halloween. Just recruit all the runners and work non stop Halloween. Get as much chocolate as possible and sell that shit all year long. It’s 100 percent profit. Genius.

I’m going to quit my job now that I know this. All these hours I work to support my mook habbit. Shit is free now! I’ll just walk from Pediatrician to Pediatrician stealing the free candy for now. Then go nuts on Halloween.

@Wave_Bandana

PS - How confused are the police gonna be when Goons start sticking up stores for Twix and shit.

PPS – Thanks to Fiend Monica for the article.

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@Wave_Bandana’s Response to Droog’s: Top 10 Rated QB’s in Madden NFL 13

Yesterday Droog posted this: Top 10 Rated QB’s in Madden NFL 13

Here is the official list:

10. Michael Vick, Philadelphia Eagles: 89 overall 
9. Tony Romo, Dallas Cowboys: 90 overall 
8. Matthew Stafford, Detroit Lions: 91 overall 
7. Philip Rivers, San Diego Chargers: 92 overall 
6. Peyton Manning, Denver Broncos: 93 overall 
5. Ben Roethlisberger, Pittsburgh Steelers: 95 overall 
4. Eli Manning, New York Giants: 97 overall 
3. Drew Brees, New Orleans Saints: 98 overall 
2. Tom Brady, New England Patriots: 98 overall 
1. Aaron Rodgers, Green Bay Packers: 99 overall 

Here is my response:

NBA 2K is better than any game you mentioned…except Madden. Madden has always been my favorite video game. I actually own every single Madden that has ever existed (got pics to prove it). It’s the only game I consistently bet money on. I am the best Madden player literally in NYC, and no member of the Super Mookin’ Fiends could ever beat me. Droog after we play you will never question me again. I’m one of those fiends that sets up packages and audibles and all that shit for hours.

That being said, besides being the best Madden player in the world, I am also one of the most knowledgeable critics.  Few comments of yours I want to respond to:

1. Top 10 QBs

Holy shit I’m so angry by this list I can’t even explain myself. I could go on and on all night with this. Instead I’ll just give you the REAL list. I’d be happy to answer any questions regarding why I have it this way:

Wave Bandana’s Madden 2013 Top 10 QBs

  1. Michael Vick; 99 Overall
  2. Eli Manning; 99 Overall
  3. Cam Newton 97 Overall
  4. Drew Brees; 96 Overall
  5. Aaron Rodgers; 92 Overall
  6. Ben Roethlisberger; 90 Overall
  7. Tony Romo; 88 Overall
  8. Philip Rivers; 85 Overall
  9.  Matt Stafford; 83 Overall
  10. RGIII; 81 Overall

McNabbbbbb

Then the 2 odd-men out because of the addition of Cam Newton and RGIII (Matt Schuab would be #11)

Tom Brady; 77 Overall

Peyton Manning; 69 Overall

2. Madden 12

I was actually happy with Madden 12. Maybe that’s because Madden 2011 was the worst sports video game I ever played since the Helsinki episode of Madden 2006 (QB Vision)…and we all know how that turned out.

In Madden 2011 it was literally impossible to win if you weren’t putting up 80 points. Strategically it made more sense to go for it on 4th and 30 in your own end-zone in the first 60 seconds of the game than it did to punt it. If you went just one possession without scoring, game over. There was no way around it. One defensive stop or turnover ended the game, that’s how absurdly easy it was to score. The offense vs defense in Madden 2011 was the most outrageous and frustrating experience I ever had (worst than trying to get all 100 hidden packages in GTA).

I hated Madden 2011 so much I almost didn’t make my annual midnight trip to pick up 2012 (almost). But I was surprisingly happy with 2012 (aside from the commentary). I loved the gang tackle animations. I felt overall it was the first time in a few years there was a complete animations overhaul. You could throw the deep ball again. Remember when they legitimately made it impossible to catch the deep ball? Obviously that came from all the complaints  of people throwing streaks to Randy Moss for a decade. I understood that, but the deep ball gets caught a few times in every real NFL game. You have to find the right balance.

I also thought the offense vs. defense was a huge improvement. By no means would I call it acceptable, but a step in the right direction. They really cut down on scrambling and forced the players to be much more realistic in the pocket. That was maybe my 2nd biggest complaint of all time was how unrealistic the scrambling and pocket presence was. Long gone are the days now where Vick ends up with 300+ yards in 5 min quarters. If you had a QB that really can’t move it made a huge difference.

What Madden 2013 needs to do is the same shit I’ve been screaming for years. Make the defense and offense completely even. Just as fun an unrealistic as the offense is, the defense should be the same. That means every time the D has a chance to make a pick, it should. No more of that bouncing off the hands shit. Any time some one does some dumb shit like scramble around and throw it cross field should be a pick. Pretty much any time it’s not a practical play should be a pick. If that means there are 10-15 interceptions a game, so be it. Not only would that FORCE players to play smart and and consequently realistic, but it would make the defense just as fun as offense. I never understood why they were okay with having outrageous  offensive stats and pretty realistic defensive stats. Make both sides equally fun and outrageous. I’m telling you it would make Madden the most fun game out.

3. Best Madden ever / Madden the Monopoly

Madden 2005 was by far the best Madden game in Madden history. I guess we agree somewhat on that. Not only did it introduce the hit stick making defense fun for the first time ever, but it was jam packed with content. Most of the game play mods and features of the Franchise mode that are still popular today were created with 2005. It was one of the bigger graphic and animations jump in the history of Madden. Madden 2005 (Ray Lewis) is head and shoulders the best game out there.

No shot was ESPN 2K5 better. That’s why that shit costs $20 cause it was a piece of shit. The only think memorable was that spot TV ad they ran. You are not alone Droog. The general sentiment in the gaming world is that ESPN 2k5 was the best football simulation ever created. They tried to make you wear a helmet when you played. That 1st person shit was miserable. I said the same thing then I’ll say now having years to reflect. Fuck you.

The only football games that could compare to Madden are the original NFL Blitz and the NFL 2K series FOR DREAMCAST. Blitz and Dreamcast literally changed my fucking life. I’ve never played a more fun sports game than Blitz still to this day. The Dreamcast 2K series paved the way for everything we have now. That shit changed the way I think about gaming experiences forever.

Originally I felt the same way you did about the Madden monopoly. I can’t understand how that was legal and Microsoft got dismantled for similar tactics Apple uses now. Without question it hurts progression. I don’t think EA is “lazy” because the gaming industry is one of the hardest industries to profit in. I don’t think they slack off. I just think because it’s a one sided vision it doesn’t allow progression. 2K and Madden both stole from each other over the years. One invented something cool, the other made it better next year. That is lost I will admit. But I wouldn’t contribute the lack of new shit just to the monopoly. EA has less than a year to make a game. How much different can you get? Groundbreaking games like Halo, Call of Duty (they use 2 different developers), GTA all have YEARS of developing. Madden gets only a few months. It’s a tough challenge. Also from reading EA interviews, they kinda hit a wall. There is only so much you can do in a short amount of time with a certain budget from a technology standpoint. The next major shift will be with new consoles.

So why do I support the monopoly?

Even though I just admitted it does hurt progression, the only thing I hate more than a lack of progression is idiots bitching about how they “woulda beat me if we played ESPn 2K”. The most annoying thing when I crush someone in a sports game is the victim complaing that they would beat me in the version of the game they play. This constantly happened with Madden vs. 2K and NBA Live vs. NBA 2K. I hate that fucking excuse so god damn much I’d rather we all play the same shitty game together. At least we know who the real champion is.

@Wave_Bandana

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Slow Motion Shark Attack

WHOA.

Phantoms are dope. Sharks are too but those niggas can jump 10 feet the fuck out the water and eat everything.

@oakshades

PS. I know three different white dudes who plan on going shark diving within the next month. What is wrong with you niggas?

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Ketchup Cup Thingies

Apparently, we — a collective of food-eating-ketchup-using hooligans — have been consuming ketchup all wrong.

If you’ve ever poured ketchup into those tiny paper cup containers and brought them back to your table for fry dunking and burger smearing, you might be a victim of ketchup ignorance as well.

Did you know that these ketchup containers are built to fan out, and are made to allow for more dunk square-footage?

As it stands, your fries probably fit pretty snugly, but imagine wanting to dip your burger into that tiny cup — not happening.

The conversation came up after a long day at the beach. I was weathered, the sun had beat down on my face, I was nothing more than a walking zombie and my barbaric eating habits must have shown. There we were, a group of my friends sitting on a picnic table outside of a local burger shack in Laguna Beach, and I was trying to dunk my burger into a cup of ketchup that looked like this:

WHOA. Seriously, how the fuck did I not realize that it’s smarter to fan that little cup out to make more room for ketchup? I’m a fucking college graduate and I didn’t fucking figure this out. Waste of 4.5 years.

@oakshades

PS. WHAT THE FUCK MOM AND DAD?

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Dude Loves Trains

This dude is a self proclaimed ‘Foamer’ aka Train nerd who foams at the mouth when they see trains. Imagine how excited he’s gonna be the first time he see’s some tits, pussy and ass in real life. Nigga might have a heart attack.

@oakshades

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Top 10 Rated QB’s in Madden NFL 13

10. Michael Vick, Philadelphia Eagles: 89 overall 
9. Tony Romo, Dallas Cowboys: 90 overall 
8. Matthew Stafford, Detroit Lions: 91 overall 
7. Philip Rivers, San Diego Chargers: 92 overall 
6. Peyton Manning, Denver Broncos: 93 overall 
5. Ben Roethlisberger, Pittsburgh Steelers: 95 overall 
4. Eli Manning, New York Giants: 97 overall 
3. Drew Brees, New Orleans Saints: 98 overall 
2. Tom Brady, New England Patriots: 98 overall 
1. Aaron Rodgers, Green Bay Packers: 99 overall 

First things first, Madden 12 was absolutely embarrassing. Bugs, glitches, players that don’t look like themselves at all, the worst commentary I’ve ever heard…the list goes on and on. As far as I’m concerned Madden hasn’t been an elite sports game since the mid to late 2000′s, its domination of the market overtaken — for me at least — by NHL, Tiger Woods and of course the ultimate in fiend sports gaming, FIFA. I know @Wave_Bandana and @oakshades are gonna jump all over me for not mentioning NBA 2K but I don’t fuck with that game at all. Same goes for any baseball game since ESPN bought out EA’s MVP Baseball franchise.

And do you know why Madden is in such a prolonged slump? Same thing that happened to baseball games, but go back to 2004. Madden released a tremendous game, they really did. But ESPN released an ever better game in ESPN NFL 2K5, you know, the one with T.O. on the cover. Not only was ESPN NFL better, it was $20 compared to paying $50 for Madden. So what do Electronic Arts and Tiburon do? Buy up all the NFL rights and not only remove their biggest competitor in forever, they also remove all incentive to truly revolutionize and improve their game. It hasn’t been the same since.

But I still have faith in Madden…if only for – holy shit — look at these QB ratings! Last year was an offensive bonanza in the NFL, so I guess it makes sense that ratings would be really high. I’m a Giants fan and trust me, it’s great to see baby Eli getting finally getting the recognition he deserves, but 97 overall!? Is there a separate rating for “clutch”? Just make that one like, 110 and then reconfigure everything else because trust me, Eli is still liable to go out there and dookie his pants for no reason in a must-win home game against the Browns. I love him (heterosexually), respect his game and trust him, but that inexplicable game can STILL happen. Everything else seems about right, although I think Matthew Stafford should be higher than Phillip Rivers if only for the fact that I fucking hate Rivers insufferable demeanor and his stupid chicken-arm looking throw. I don’t care if it (kinda) works. Also, how do we know Peyton’s head isn’t going to fall off? One big hit stick and he’s dead on the field.

I’d critique more but I know @Wave_Bandana is probably going to go off about how I’m an idiot for not liking NBA 2K. It won’t make that game not suck though.

-Droog

 

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XXL 15th Anniversary Issue

Good shit Kendrick. “After Snoop, Eminem & 50Cent, Dr. Dre brings us hip-hops next big star” That’s a great look for him.

Can’t believe XXL has been around for 15 years already. I remember my cousin showing me the first issue back in the day.

Kinda thought they would do a little more with a 15th Anniversary cover though, no? I been fucking with Kendrick so it’s cool with me but East Coast rappers gotta be a little salty.

@Wave_Bandana

 

 

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