Yea have fun on fucking Facebook while we’re all out getting fucked up with all the bitches!!!
First off, is there a worse website than Facebook to send a group of depressed, friendless teenagers that don’t get invited to parties? 85% of newsfeeds are filled with pictures of people out partying and getting fucked up. So while this poor asshole is siting alone waiting for someone to like his post on Above The Influence, he has to see 100 pictures constantly reminding him that the rest of his school is out living it up, getting trashed. Let’s see how long they last looking at pictures of assholes writing “Above the Influence” on their hands when their newsfeed is popping with the hottest girls/guys in their school instagraming pictures of blunts and crushing beer bongs. Facebook could be the worst place in the world for these people. You would honestly be better off sending them to Super Mookin Fiends’.
You anti drug people have zero understanding of your audience. It’s astounding. You just told kids instead of going out and enjoying life it would be much cooler to lock yourself in a room and hide behind a computer screen. This is your alternative to parties/drugs/alcohol? Just spend all weekend playing World of Warcraft and liking other sick bastards’ Facebook statuses in complete isolation?
These commercials just make me sick. As a fiend, I take it as a personal diss every time I see one. They do not reach a single person. Take this money you’re wasting on airing spots during prime time TV, and donate it to some charity that is actually making a difference.
Another thing that always annoys me, what fucking town do these kids live in where there is such an abundance of drugs and alcohol that they are literally forcing kids to take them? They always make it seem like if you don’t do drugs or drink that the whole world is going to shun you. I think it’s actually the opposite. Any time I offer someone drugs and alcohol I am secretly praying that they decline. When I’m at a party smoking a blunt or standing next to my 30 rack, and someone comes up to me, my first thought is NEVER, “is this kid coool mannnn, is he down?? If not, I’m gonna force him or kick him out!” Never happens. My real thought IS ALWAYS “great, now I gotta give this motherfucker a beer or let him hit the blunt”. So when I offer and the person declines, I’m happy as shit! I was polite and now there is more sour and beers for me! You feel me? Like if your reaction is to try and make someone drink or smoke your shit, your problem isn’t drugs, it’s being a spoiled rich kid. Anyone else would be happy as shit that the person declined, that means more shit for the real fiends. This goes especially for cocaine. That shit is dumb expensive, hearing “naw man, thanks, I don’t do that shit”, is my second favorite thing to hear while doing coke, falling just short of a girl telling me “lets rail lines and fuck”. Come to think of it, I kinda love anti drug mugs…
Look, I have no issue in choosing not to do drugs or drink. Generally speaking, that’s usually a red flag that you suck and I’m going to hate you, but by no means do I have issues with that. What I do have issue with is people that tell others how to live their one and only life. I hate these people more than anyone else on earth, I hope you all catch a mean case of Gonorrhea in your lifetime. You don’t have “courage to stand up”, you’re just a fucking pretentious asshole using inadequate/outdated/unjustified/manipulated/corrupted data and research to support your irrational claims. You don’t want to drink or smoke? Fucking fine! No one gives a fuck, that means more for us you bitch ass. But don’t try to band together and tell me what the fuck to do. And PLEASE, take my advice, do not lock yourself in a room and play on the computer all day. Avoiding drugs is not worth becoming a depressed recluse. What’s the difference between smoking weed and doing nothing, or sitting on the computer all night? You can still go out and party (and absolutely clean up on drug chicks/dudes)! You can still have lots of friends. You can still hang out in the same room as those that drink and do drugs. Just don’t do it yourself then. No one gives a fuck, the world does not revolve around you. Go out, learn lessons, take your lumps, ENJOY FUCKING LIFE.
FUCK. This shit gets me so angry. It’s so simple.
PS – I really hate to give the game away. Bas hates it when mugs give the game away. But I’m going to do you anti drug propaganda makers a solid and tell you how to reach your target demo. The execution part is on you. But these are the touch-points, concepts, and sentiments you should focus on:
#1 – Make all hot girls think that drinking and drugs makes them fat or something only a complete slut cake whore would do. This is crucial because it helps the female and the male sexes.
#2 – I’m a complete fiend. So are my friends. The only times we have ever stopped being a fiend is when we we are fucking a really hot girl that tells us we can’t fuck if we don’t stop drinking/doing coke/smoking/etc. That’s it. That is the only time a man will rise above the influence, when a hot girl tells him he can’t fuck unless he stops doing whatever. I’ve quit cigarettes, coke, acid, weed, even drinking, ONLY for bitches. Because as much as I love drugs and alcohol, I love pussy just a little more.
So, make hot girls think this shit makes them hoes or obese, then let the hot girls tell dudes they can’t fuck unless they stop.
BOOM. I just solved all your problems. Now go waste more money figuring out how to execute.