GET DUNKED ON!

WATCH YO HEAD.

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#NP Dreams – @JColeNC

I was just walking one of the fiend pups that I pupsit this morning. It’s cold and rainy and shit. Dreams came on my iPod and it brought me right back to 2010. Dreams is one of my favorite joints Cole ever made. It appealed to the creepy 13 year old Eminem fan in me. I also was crushing hard on a curly haired Jewish chick that lived with my homegirl at the time. She had the lamest fucking boy friend who got to smash and motorboat her amazing tittays. If I had a motherfucking driver’s license and wasn’t deathly afraid of getting raped in prison, maybe I would … NO I WOULDN’T HAVE CAUSE IT’S JUST A SONG. PLEASE DO NOT KILL ANYONE YOU FUCKING FIENDS.

@oakshades

PS. Do ya’ll understand how crazy it is that Cole wrote this song, then fast forward three years continued the story of this chick in his new smash hit single with Miguel and then paired the new song with a visual that depicted the story of Dreams?

That’s some deep shit yo.

PPS. MTV Interview Bout Dreams/Power Trip

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Ship My Pants – KMart Commercial

Wave and I got into the advertising world cause we mooked alot in college and decided we could make way better commercials then most of the scrub niggas making commercials. This shit right here? THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE???? Almost made me ship my pants. Good job KMart.

@oakshades

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How To Deal With Photobombers

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Shit White People Do: Light Wakeboarding

I just wanna know what kinda mook these fiends were mooking when they thought of this. And how dope is Red Bull? Came outta nowhere in the beverage industry, fucked up the caffeine game and have consistently used tweaked out shit like … LIGHT WAKEBOARDING to remain as a cool brand. This is another case study I plan on teaching in 20 years when I’m an adjunct professor at NYU.

@oakshades

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Ants Are Mad Smart Yo

redwoodantmounds

Ants with the world’s worst taste in real estate seem to sense earthquakes before they strike, according to research presented today (April 11) at the European Geosciences Union annual meeting in Vienna.
Active faults, fractures where the Earth violently ruptures in earthquakes, are the preferred housing site for red wood ants in Germany. Researcher Gabriele Berberich of the University Duisburg-Essen in Germany has counted more than 15,000 red wood ant mounds lined up along Germany’s faults, like candy drops on a conveyor belt.

For three years, Berberich and her colleagues tracked the ants 24-7 with video cameras, using special software to catalog behavioral changes. There were 10 earthquakes between magnitude 2.0 and 3.2 during the study period, 2009 to 2012, and many smaller temblors. The ants only changed behavior for quakes larger than magnitude 2.0, which also happens to be the smallest quakes that humans can feel.
During the day, ants busily went about their daily activity, and at night the colony rested inside the mound, mirroring human diurnal patterns, Berberich said at a news conference today. But before an earthquake, the ants were awake throughout the night, outside their mound, vulnerable to predators, the researchers found. Normal ant behavior didn’t resume until a day after the earthquake, Berberich said.
So how do ants know an earthquake is coming? Berberich suspects the insects pick up changing gas emissions or local shifts in the Earth’s magnetic field.

“Red wood ants have chemoreceptors for carbon dioxide gradients and magnetoreceptors for electromagnetic fields,” she said. “We’re not sure why or how they react to the possible stimuli, but we’re planning on going to a more tectonically active region and see if ants react to larger earthquakes,” Berberich added.

When I was 14 my biology teacher told us he could predict where Earthquakes would hit. Nigga was wrong as shit. He had no way of predicting this. Fast forward to this morning when I read this shit and it turns out red ants can predict Earthquakes? I don’t know what this means, and I don’t know if this shit interests you fiends but I think Ants are creepy as shit but equally as fascinating. Like peep game about Aspartame. We’ve all had a Diet Coke or a Sweet N Low before. That shit is made with Aspartame.

smart-ants

So ants will look out for eachother and tell other fiend ants not to grub on Aspartame but Humans make this shit and advertise it as healthy. I’m bout to cop an ant army. They finna protect me from Aspartame and Earthquakes.

@oakshades

VIA

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FRIDAY FIEND OF THE WEEK: The Honey Badger

TMatLSU2

Tyrann Mathieu is in Arizona today on a 10-team tour of pre-draft meetings as he tries to convince as many clubs as possible that he’s worthy of an investment in the draft.
The former LSU cornerback must make teams believe he’s put a lengthy history with marijuana behind him and Jarrett Bell of USA Today reports that the cornerback told one team he failed at least 10 drug tests in school.

“I quit counting at 10,” Mathieu told one team, according to an assistant coach that spoke to Bell on condition of anonymity. “I really don’t know.”

Mathieu is wearing a suit and tie in his meetings with teams and he is adamant he has been clean since October since he was picked up on marijuana charges. The coach told Bell if Mathieu failed as many as 10 drug tests that LSU didn’t do enough to help the player.

NFL clubs must determine if they have the structure in place to work with Mathieu, knowing that an investment in him will be a risk. How big of a risk is the question.

I love weed. I really do. Weed makes me less depressed. Weed has introduced me to so many cool people. Weed makes bad TV awesome TV. Weed helps me come up with cool ass ideas. All of that being said. If I had the opportunity to make millions and the only thing I had to do was not smoke weed… I’d probably end up failing 10 drug tests too. <==== I wasn't planning on typing that but as I hit this J and sipped my coffee, I realized that I'd be in the same boat as this mug. FIEND.

@oakshades

PS. I’d 100% take this nigga on the Jets. I’d also smoke mad mook with him after we smoke the Patriots.
PPS. Let’s not talk about the alcoholic culture that goes hand in hand with American Football. Let’s focus on weed instead. #legalizeit

VIA

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#NP @S_C_ – Open Letter

Jay-Z-Intro

Some homies take to twitter to air out their issues. Some just talk shit over Timbo x Swizz instrumentals.

@oakshades

PS. The White House’s comment on Hov’s new joint. THE MOTHERFUCKING WHITE HOUSE.

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Republican County Commissioner Drops The N-Bomb Mid Meeting

GILE

Saline County Commissioner Jim Gile said it was a “bad choice of words” Tuesday when he used the expression “nigger-rigging it” in a heated discussion with Commissioner John Price.
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Coachella 2013 Becomes Super Mookin Fiendchella

2012 Coachella Valley Music & Arts Festival - Weekend 1 - Day 3

Bought these tickets a year ago, putting the costs, the (lack of a) lineup, where I’d be staying and who I’d even be going with out of sight and mind. By noon tomorrow (California time) I’ll be poolside in Palm Springs putting my body through the beginning stages of five days of absolutely irreversible bodily harm and degeneracy.

“Disappointing” headliners have given way to the reality of the festival this year — a scrumptiously stacked undercard. When they released set times last night I immediately developed several ulcers knowing the conflicts I would run into at Conflictchella. Tame Imapala vs. Rodriguez? Two Door Cinema Club vs. Moby? Vampire Weekend vs. Pretty Lights? Modest Mouse vs. Local Natives? At first I attempted to untangle this web before promptly realizing it was futile and screaming “Fuck it! We’ll do it live!” Before the set times brought forth the inevitable crushing of my idealist festival going dreams, here’s a list of everyone I had planned to see.

But the nature of a festival meaning you’re never going to see all your acts won’t keep me from hyper-indulgence. Anything but. Now it’s relishing the psychedelia of Tame Impala. The tropical synth bombast of Phoenix and their new album “Bankrupt.” The falsetto fuckery of Passion Pit. The throbbing bass of TNGHT or Bassnectar. An infinite spectrum of sound coursing through my chemically imbalanced brain. I wish I could say I’d do enough fiend shit to sustain the entirety of the SMF crew, but that would require me dying in the desert and I seriously don’t feel like doing that this weekend. Perhaps another time.

Until next week when I’m sitting with a gun in my month at a desk that doesn’t face a window and typing a recap for the fiends that couldn’t make it, be safe everyone.

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