Yo man. This shit is amazing. How is Compton Reacts to Magic not on ABC right now? I’m dying. Why do black people have the best reactions to shit? It’s amazing. I’d watch this kid walk around the hood doing magic tracks for 2 hours a night if the world let me.
Laugh our asses off at this huge chick tryna stabilize her core in order to get out of this ball pit.
Then let’s take about another 3 minutes to:
Feel terrible about America as a whole because we’re so goddamn fat that we just spent 22 seconds watching a huge chick try to stabilize her core in order to get out of this ball pit and then 3 minutes laughing at her.
Seriously though, I don’t fuck with ball pits. That shit is just a super nasty fucking premise. Have you seen kids? Have you smelled kids? Have you ever been to McDonalds? Let’s go ahead and add all of those different components together. Then let’s toss in some Sweet and Sour sauce, three chicken slime nuggets, four kids sized Minute Maid Fruit Punches and some chocolate fudge covered peanuts that have been sucked dry and spit out by BobbyJo the 3 toothed 6 year old who likes pinching strangers.
I’m gonna send my kid into that breeding ground for disease? Now that I’m really thinking about it, what the fuck was wrong with my parents? Why would they let me in that pit of germs? Was I really that annoying as a child? So annoying that my mom would risk me catching Face Herpes for a moment of solitude with a Big Mac? (YES FACE HERPES IS A THING)
My kids are getting turkey sandwiches, carrot sticks, water with lemon slices and trail mix. When they’re done eating we’ll go to the park where they can run sprints pretending that they are cheetahs, or whatever wild shit their brain dreams up of. No McDonalds and Ball Pits. That shit is unhealhty. Plus poppa oakshades can’t covertly hit a one hitter inside of a McDonalds Play Area and he definitely will be able to do that at an outdoor park.
PS. Why the fuck does McDonalds taste so different from when we were kids. That shit was delicious. Now I gotta be high as shit and that shit needs to be fresh out the oven for me to even enjoy a bite.
PPS. Or drunk. Everything tastes amazing when you’re drunk.
Ron’s face is the only way I can accurately describe how last night felt. Real shit what a fucking homecoming. SOB’s was fucking packed. Front to back filled with …
I got to the venue at 6:45 pm for soundcheck and what do I see? A full on Brazilian band including chicks in those wild dresses doing the salsa and shit, but also a crazy fucking line of fiends and dreamvillains waiting to get in to the venue.
Shit paid off cause you guys got a great view of the show.
It was a family affair so Bas brought out Quick for Fiji Water In My Iron. Fucking dope as shit to see Quick and Bas perform for the first time on the same stage. I’m so used to being mooked as shit watching them make music, not perform it.
Seeing Mama in the front row rocking out was fucking crazy. I heard my mom was out in the crowd flipping Fiend tees for the low. How fucking funny is that shit?
Look how bodied this fiend Gunna is. He prolly launched 15 tshirts into the crowd yesterday.
WE MADE IT.
Funny story. We told this fiend Dre to jump into the crowd. Fiends got a little too hype and launched him into the crowd. Normally a crowd will catch a fiend. Not in NYC tho. Fiends sidestepped him with the quickness, but on the second go around he was lifted to the sky like mook smoke out the lungs.
Shouts to these two fiends for putting together a dope vibe for the show.
Shouts to all the fans that not only copped a ticket, but copped a CD, a tshirt, told 4 of their friends. Shouts to everyone that has been showing us love man.
Shouts to Sheets for holding everyone down with the fresh FIENDS gear.
Last summer we turned crazy at Westway. There was about 200 of us in there getting shitfaced. Bas performed like three songs. Shit was amazing. An all around crazy night. Fast forward less than a year and this fiend sold 450 tickets at SOB’s.
We finna hire this fiend to chef up for our BBQ this summer. Shit … should we throw a dope ass BBQ this summer somewhere in the city? Who doesn’t love a good ass BBQ? Gotta do it in the city tho. Queens BBQs get way too hot in the summer.
I mean it really doesn’t get much better then this dude taking his dog up a fucking mountain and jumping off it with him strapped to his back. At first I was like holy fuck this is fucked. Like imagine being this dog. What the fuck is going through his head. Then I realized that maybe this dog doesn’t have a goddamn clue he’s up a mountain? Then I was like maybe he likes being up on this mountain? Dogs kinda enjoy everything outside of being beat on and inclement weather. So who knows… maybe this dog is having the time of it’s life?
Fiends are getting old man. Feels like just yesterday this mug Bas was bodied on The Carter rooftop telling Jota that he doesn’t rap. Fast forward to today and we’re putting together our first tour. Fucking dope. Here’s to many more happy and healthy years fiend.